My Experience with Violence & How We Can Help

As a 19 year old starting college, I really am starting to see the world in a different light than I once did. As a child, as cliché as it sounds, I thought that the world was peaceful, happy and safe. Unfortunately now, I cannot say that, because in reality we are facing dangers every time we leave our house without the fear of gun shed or being taken by someone and violated. Even though these dangers are everywhere, I still try to live my life to the fullest, but as a young adult now really entering the ‘real world,’ I feel I can now really form my opinions and feelings on the issues in the world today. There is one form of violence that stood out to me directly.
Something that really does affect me is sexual abuse, I think it is one of the most prevalent and life altering violence there is. It is demeaning, and the victim is never the same anymore. I would like to say that it’s not very common, but unfortunately that’s not true. I finally realized all of harm that was actually going on in the world in 2009, when a friend of mine took me to a youth group that she and a number of my friends went to every other Saturday night. I was hesitant in going, as I was a very shy 15 year old girl, but I was finally convinced, and it changed my life forever.
The group was called Y.A.S.O., which stood for Young Adults Speak Out (http://yasolockport.tripod.com). Everyone that attended sat in a giant circle and talked about the issues in the world, in schools, and effecting the youth today. As I looked around the room, I thought to myself, these are very different people. People I have never seen before, weird people, but you could visibly see the friendships that were formed. As people gathered before the meeting, everyone greeting and hugging one another; no matter how different they all were, their ties were unbreakable.
When the meeting started, the hearts poured out. Our topic was domestic violence, and as we bounced from person to person, waiting for their opportunity to speak, I was in tears, and so were those telling their stories. They talked about abuse at home, of anger, of factors that affected them at home. I couldn’t believe what was going on. In a group of 40 or so young adults, over half had been victims, from abusive parents, friends, and even significant others. I couldn’t believe it. From that moment on my life changed.
Our topics have varied from bullying in school, abuse, suicide, and other forms of violence. We have done a lot to help those in our group from counseling to even help getting them out of harmful situations. We have partnered with Guardian Angel Home, and have had [state representative] Emily McCasey visit, who, as a result of her visit with Y.A.S.O., helped get laws dealing with abuse passed in Illinois. We also recently have had C. Desir visit us, author of Fault Line, a book dealing with the story of a rape victim. She told us her story of her past as well as what she does with rape survivors and her reason for writing her book. I have poured my heart and soul into this group, and as our 5 year anniversary approaches, I look back at all we have done and continue to do, the lives we have touched, and the unbreakable friendships I have made. I am now a co-leader of the group and I get to choose topics to talk to our group about. We are real, and we address the issues that are hard to talk about and we make progress. We are not a large non for profit group, or well known, but we are making a difference, and are always welcoming new people to join and talk about the issues of today.
Life is not rainbows and sunshine, but with the help of those willing to make a difference, we can start the steps to get back to the peace we really need. We can get there. The abuse and violence needs to stop, and now the question is, how do we do it? Is any step to small or can any small contribution make a difference? What are you doing to advocate against violence?

Alyssa G.